my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize