I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize