Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Just invented taco cereal.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
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