Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
