it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
