Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
