WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
