So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Randomize
