a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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