Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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