is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
