I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
