how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
