I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
