I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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