he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
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