I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
