dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We had to coat check the pizza.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
