We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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