i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
