NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
