We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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