just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
