his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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