She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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