Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
