oh god the rape fog is back!
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize