if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
