apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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