Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
