I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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