Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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