I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
