Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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