Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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