We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
