TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
