I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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