it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Randomize
