You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
