everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Randomize