i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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