its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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