Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
