So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize