Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize