she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
