Having a random hookup so left but love u
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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