Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
