haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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