New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
